Dear Journalism, (on the occasion of my finishing grad school)

One word, dear friend, before I let you go back to your staff cuts: all that bullshit talk about you dying before I even get a stab at being a hot-shot investigative reporter, galoping across the steppes breaking pipeline scandals in Khirghizstan, whilst researching a book about trends in West African hip-hop on the side, is pure madness. Do you hear me.

Wipe that smirk off you face, J-dog. I’m actually serious. Proof? I’m getting myself a new trenchcoat, sturdy notepads and oversized desert-ready sunglasses no later than tomorrow. Mark my word, cupcakes: I won’t be deterred.

Yours always,

Ms Weldon